Lt. General Arjun Ray, PVSM, VSM, CEO – Indus Trust, has been awarded the Education Today Life Time Achievement Award 2018 for his incredible contribution in the field of education. He is an exemplary learner, teacher and leader with a vision and strategies to bring innovation in education.
In this article Mr. Ray explains why having a notion that your children belong to you is misleading.
Training children can be done in different ways as there is no manual on how best to train your child. Therefore, the best way to train your child is the way that ensures they grow to be fully groomed and well-disciplined which is subject to the culture. The environment where the children are exposed to will help shape their character. Having the notion that your children belongs to you might be misleading.
Take for example a poem by Khilal Gibran which says “your children do not belong to you, they come through you not from you: This saying might raise a lot of dispute due to the various belief in religion and maybe emotions from the parents. But let us not get into the scientific aspect of bringing a child to this world, instead, the focus should be on the belief that there is one above all of us and the child was given to you by this person, which makes you a vessel. Enough of the religious talks, all what was mentioned earlier means is that you should avoid having the mentality that your children belong to you. Although they do, training them should not be aimed at your satisfactory alone, but all that matters.
Looking at it philosophically, the role of a parent in any culture is that of a Stuart: A Stuart in this context serves as a surname or a lineage’s name. And going by this, aside the fact that parents have the responsibility of taking care of their children, philosophically, all the parent does is pass down their surname to their children.
Parenting is culture-specific: They say culture is life! But that life doesn’t mean everything under the word culture means the same life. Culture like they say means one word but that word does not mean all cultures are the same. In fact, I can say it is culture that differentiates people from each other. This is the reason children raised in India holds a different personality from children raised in America or Canada. And even within the same country, the cultures are still different.