Dr. V. M. Patil, Ph.D. Synthetic Studies in Benzofurans from Gulbarga University. He has a total of 39 years of research and teaching experience. He is currently the principal of Rural Engineering College, Hulkoti.
Failure means not getting the desired outcome from actions taken. I know this word sounds very scary and no one ever wants to fail, but shouldn’t this be something we should all be prepared for?
Success comes at a cost, but failure is the driver for that cost. Breaking it down, this simply means failure is what drives one to want to succeed if such failure is handled correctly. And handling failure properly can and should be taught to our children at the early stages of their lives.
An overwhelming feeling comes with failure and this feeling, if not careful has the power to shred a person’s self-esteem but on the bright side of it, this can be a stepping stone to achieving greater things. Failure is bad and could be worse if not properly taken care of, but handling it correctly can lead to various things that will change a person’s life for the better.
Parents also have a significant part to play in their children’s lives in the aspect of failure and how children handle it. Though no one wants their children to fail, it is important to be by our children’s side when they do. Being by their side in this context does not mean nagging regularly and reminding them how much of a disappointment they are to you for failing. Instead, we can encourage them with our support, help them in changing their strategies and the way of approach to problems and this act will boost their self-confidence to make them face any challenges the world throws at them.
Some parents love to compare their kids with that of their friends’ or neighbors’. This is not encouraging. Because their children passed an exam or interview and yours didn’t, does not mean your child will not do other things better than the other kids.
Parents should also learn to respect their children’s opinion no matter the urge to disagree. This does not mean we should not advise them, but your will shouldn’t be imposed on them when it comes to making a big decision for their lives like choosing a course of study. We might be successful in forcefully imposing a career path for them, but the aftermath might turn out worse. Either they do what they do not enjoy which leads to reading for grades and not knowledge or they fail woefully at it.
This is not an excuse to fail, but if we ever find ourselves in that position the best ways to handle it are:
Like it is popularly said if the world throws you a lemon, make lemonade out of it: This means a good thing can be made out of a bad experience. Failure is bad in its way but also functional as it reduces overconfidence and gives us the chance to try a different approach.
Learn from the mistakes: we learn every day and mistakes is one of the things we learn from to avoid making them again in the future. Failing an exam or interview is a mistake due to whatever reasons that shouldn’t be made the next time when such exam or interview will be retaken.
3. Parents can try to influence their children’s opinion but not impose their’s on the children.